madonna / whore
i could throw this rotting carcass at your feet,
and watch you stare blanky at the carnage
but that's not very polite, is it?
so much noise in my head
having a little wiggle
curating my leg hairs
the hours before the sunrise are always the loneliest
i won't tell
expelling demons from my body : )
curiouser and curiouser still
washed my face (very big deal)
i miss haunted ebay dolls
too many broken birds
halfway through the veil
in my dream, i was in a school play. it was a dress rehearsal.
i was standing on a riser platform with a bunch of other people
wearing long silver dresses. we each took turns walking down to a
microphone on the stage to introduce ourselves as angels.
i was the angel 333.
i like Gwen Stefani but only as A Concept
tiktok keeps suggesting me videos of teen girls off of their psych
meds running away from home...is this some kind of sign?
who does the algorithm think i am?
dreamed of slenderman. i haven't thought about slenderman in idk
how many years.
blink your eyes slowly like a sleepy cat
a tiny sound
the unique vibrations of every soul
awake. wide awake. i spent most of today in a dream, so now i'm awake.
what do i do...?
mom bought a motion-activated light for the toilet seat so now the toilet
glows purple when you walk past it
accidently poked my own eye
last night i lucid dreamed that i floated up through the ceiling &
into another room, & then just kept going up and up....
the world and all of its rough edges
favorite word of the day: unhinged
slowly woke up after taking some nyquil & hallucinated the word "test" floating
on my ceiling
....so i just up & forgot about this for like 2 months. sorry!!!!
bad brain stuff
i hate to have A Feeling
something i just realized about my dreams:
lately, my dream self doesn't always walk from place to place...it's more
like a glide. like, i can float from one side of the room to another...?
i don't think i used to do this. guess dream-me doesn't need legs now
last night a spider crawled into my hand as i watched a lady channel alien
messages through her body
a guy jumped in front of my car. not cuz he craved death or anything, but
because he thought i was driving too fast in his neighborhood. real macho superman shit.
if i was in a better headspace i'd be able to laugh this off as just a crazy old person
making a fool of themselves, but you don't see these kinds of things in my hometown. it's
a trance remix randomly came on the radio & i feel healed
there's lavender sprigs all over my desk
guess i've forgotten
throbbing under the skin
i die over and over again in my dreams
the sky home is wild
the fear just keeps building, overflowing and spilling out
like an empty doll
god i love dirt
expressing myself to the walls
perfumed trash bags
garden of eden in suburbia. a little brown rabbit is eating a fallen
tomato under a rainbow
too much too soon
the Vibes are just...BAD.....
love how black cherries stain your tongue
we made beautiful dreams...but that's all they were, were dreams.
by the morning, they didn't mean anything at all
where does the time go ?
lady at the gas station is singing to herself
ripped out an eyelash while listening to cher
a trail of bread crumbs leading to an empty room that was once full of life...
but now not even the ghosts live here
it doesn't have to be as bad as all that
DEMENTED FAIRY FUCK
it's almost 4 in the morning and i'm so fucking lonely
dreamed i pet a tiny cat that was dressed up as hatsune miku
how long does it take for a chicken to lay an egg...??
alone in a parking lot
getting deja vu of getting deja vu
have tumby ache
saw 7777 immediately upon waking and found the cat waiting for me on the stairs
i wish i could peel all of the skin off of my face and start over
perpetual panic. feels like my limbs are weighted and i'm being pulled to
the ground. shadows on the walls of the cave.
pounding in my ears
i've had nothing to say. i'm listening to a power drill right now.
nothing is permanent
say it softly, soon, soon
when the sun falls, i'm always looking for that warm blanket
inner peace found in a sprinkler's rainbow mist
it is the wee hours of the morning
and i am in the fridge
touching all of the yogurts
pretty pink pills
little birds in a parking lot
put your ear to the ground and listen to the rumble
kissing lots of girls on the astral plane
next big hipster fashion trend should be everyone dressing as dainty
lil pierrot clowns, with big pointy hats and always-sad faces
real insomnia & shitposty hours
wish i could have done better. i'm trying to pray but it's hard.
all i can do is cry "what else can you take from me?"
i am destroyed
dress hem caught on the breeze
all of my thoughts have left my head. they dribbled out of my ear
as i slept and now my skull is completely empty.
pretty little memory
the whole damn world is so heavy. it feels like it's about to burst.
dreaming in neon
so i haven't had anything interesting to say.........sorry
a little voice whispers: "but what is it that you really want to say?"
like i'm slipping
talking to the spiders on my floor
visceral memories of the imdb forums
a horrid little nightmare
the energy of a space
the cat next to me is having a dream
heart pounding. listening to strawberry switchblade. feel like i'm a bursting
cannon and my soul is just shooting out of my body.
dreamed that i had died
music box ballerina
somehow i feel naked & vulnerable even though there's no one around
hallucinated a spider sneaking behind my monitor....
sour candy puckered lips and a cherry-stained tongue
will i just mess it up again...?
tonight's nagging thought: what if i got a metal detector...?
i want to stand in the middle of a library
i miss those abandoned fields filled with bittersweet vines, and my hello kitty walkman
listening to fall out boy acoustics and feelin like a lil elf
a lot of thoughts. if i could will myself to do anything...
accountability! what a concept!
can't find my tATu cd....
saw a little boy with a white towel wrapped around his body standing
out in the rain. you couldn't see his face. he looked like a little ghost.
sweat or blood ?
dreamed of aliens showing humanity a giant floppy disk in the stars
sometimes the internet is good: accidently stumbled across the japanese
furby enthusiast community and it's just wonderful.
seasalt air and clammy skin. bare feet against cold, smooth cement. the ceilings were
too high and the stairways never-ending. the roaring crashes of the ocean waves always
unnerved me, but somehow i'm always nostalgic for it, out of the blue.
the faintest hello
there's a hole
sheepishly peeking my head around the corner to observe the chaos
something in my fridge smells real bad and i'm afraid to find out what
a fire in the pit of my stomach
fistfuls of dirt
i would like to not be afraid
i'll commit social suicide if i want to!!
endless scroll to fill the hole
all of my insides are trembling
there were so many instances in my young life that just felt...a bit wrong.
like shoes that don't fit quite right.
there are so many spiders
can you hear the song ?
funny feeling in my throat: something like a gasp. like that moment just before you get the hiccups...
but no hiccups are coming
gap in my memory. where did my soul go while i was asleep ?
old habits die hard
mixed messages in the tarot. "drop the facade"
eating beans and crying about angels
looked at my breakfast and thought "gamer fuel".....
it came up like blood
cute-but-grubby skateboarder type behind me in the convenience store. rainbow stickers all over his
helmet, huge amount of plastic keychains on his backpack. he's buying a shit ton of candy bars. what
.....my mom just called me an emo.
there's a staggering number of wildly elegant women at this garden center. wide sun
hats and heeled sandals. ralph lauren logos with perfectly color-coordinated face
masks. i feel underdressed.
accidently touched a tumor on a dog's belly
the digital display on the front of a bus says "wash your hands!"
suddenly aware of all of the blood rushing thru my body
we talked about the future, and about dreams, and of our teeth falling out
transported back in time to when i was a toddler hiding under the blankets
sitting barefoot in the grass
ghostly echo in the garden
gotta drown my thoughts out
i got my laundry done, and that's...something
you were but a child
dead bug on my floor
sinking ice deep in the bellows of your stomach
a shivering chill even when the heat is vibrating off of the pavement
the world is on fire. change is imminent. dreamed i held a tiny baby bird.
u n p l u g g e d
just saying the same things over and over again with different words
can't remember if i saw something on twitter, or if i saw it in
a dream i had about twitter (what kind of things are posted
about on dream-twitter...?)
blanket of gentleness falling over the forest
dreamed of unending hallways
cloying smell of gasoline. cough drop wrapper floating in
the air conditioner breeze.
i wore a necklace yesterday and that was a big deal.